Hi guys! Welcome to episode 246 of the wildly successful Lifestyle podcast! If you are new to the podcast, welcome! Im excited to be here with you and if you’ve been here a while, Im just as excited to be with you as well. I’m so grateful to you for listening and sharing and giving me a 5 star review, it means so much to me, I want you to know that. Ok.
I did a really scary thing this last week. It was nuts. And I hold you guys responsible for it. Just kidding. I’m kidding but kind of not because I always want to walk my talk.
So what was it that was so scary? I agreed to be a last minute keynote speaker for a company that was having an awards ceremony and the speaker they had lined up got sick and couldn’t get on the plane. So I get a call mid day and they were like Heidi, would you be able to help us and step in and be our guest speaker? I was like “tomorrow”? Are you insane? I had to tell them let me regroup and I’ll call you back with an answer but I had just done an episode talking about doing scary things, so how was I going to say no to something I wanted to do and the only reason I wouldn’t is because I was terrified to do it. That would be a betrayal to my message in a way and I’m not gonna let that happen so I called back and said ok dammit I’ll do it.
I have lots of experience writing speeches and I knew I had several I could pull together from my toastmasters meetings and so that’s what I did. I was able to gather enough information about who I’d be talking to and tailor that information so that it would add value to them individually but also as a group. And that’s what I did. The night before I was so nervous I was nauseous. But I woke up that morning with a new feeling, one of excitement. I equate it with the moment your fever breaks, it’s marked how much better I felt. You know why? Because I trust myself.
I know I can do this. I know I’ve got a speech that’s really good and applies to the audience and I know I can speak in front of people. I do it every Friday with my toastmasters group. Now that’s virtual but it’s still helping me grow and develop as a speaker. And it’s part of why I trust myself. Because I’ve put in the work. I feel like I make a speech to you guys every week twice a week I can do it for 15 minutes in front of live people. It’s just a new challenge but I’m ready for it. I trust that I can do it.
That’s what got me through that morning leading up to my speech is my trust in myself.
I had done the work, I had written the speeches, I just had to tailor them to my audience which is what I did. My experience in front of toastmasters, my experience in front of the video camera making videos, my experience talking to you guys…all added to the reason I was able to confidently say “I trust myself to do this”. That thought got me through. I know that when I need to turn it on, I can and I have the work to prove that. The speech went really well.
I went into it knowing that I could definitely be embarrassed or feel humiliated but I could also nail it and do an amazing job and I think it landed somewhere in the middle and for me that’s a win, because it was my first keynote speaking event.
Here’s the thing. My friend who owns the company trusted me enough to make the call asking me to do it. The question I had to ask is do I trust myself enough to say yes.
I’ve learned to trust myself. Learning to trust yourself comes from prior experience and putting in the work. My little sister Molly likes to say if you stay ready you don’t have to get ready. I was able to say yes to being a speaker because I was ready. Are you making yourself ready to say yes when an opportunity comes your way? Sometimes, you don’t know the vehicle in which your dreams are going to show up so it’s good to always be ready. This applies to everything and anything in your life that you want.
I trust that I will go the gym or exercise at least 4-5 times a week because I consistently do that. I say I’m going to do it and I do it.
I trust that I’m going to drink maximum 2 days a week because that’s what I’ve said I’ll do. I trust myself to do that. It took a while to get there but once I made a decision I trust myself to keep it. It’s not perfect but I know if I commit, Im going to show up, and that isn’t just when I commit to other people, it’s when I commit to myself as well.
Why do we put more trust in the things we tell other people we will do than what we tell ourselves we will do?
When you tell a friend that you will meet them for lunch, you’re going to meet them for lunch. They trust that you’ll be there and you trust that you’ll be there because you would never leave them hanging. You would not tell someone you love you would do something and then just not do it. But we do it all the time to ourselves.
We say. Ok I’m only going to eat or drink these certain foods or I’m going to go to the gym this amount of times, Im only going to look at social media for 20 minutes, Im going to wake up at a certain time every morning but then we don’t follow through. I believe the goals we set for ourself come first. We should be able to trust ourselves. Why do we let ourselves down?
Is it because we think we are less important than someone else? Is it because we think it’s selfish to put ourselves first, to really take care of ourself? That we are not worthy of our priority and if we are constantly doing things for other people it gives us a sense of worthiness? Doing things for other people is great, of course but not at the expense of doing what you’ve said you’ll do for yourself?
I want you to think about the people you know or know of that really keep their word to themselves, they know their worthiness and they put themselves as a priority. My guess is you don’t look at them and think they are selfish, you look at them and think wow, I wish I could do that. You can, you just have to remember you are worthy of having anything you desire. You’re worthy of your own trust.
Maybe it’s not so much you don’t think you’re worthy, maybe you’re just trying to do too much at one time. Social media gives us the idea we should be doing something else, looking a different way, being in a different place but where you are is exactly where you should be, and everything you’ve done up until now is what has gotten you here. If you keep doing the same thing, you’re going to stay right where you are. Sometimes the reason we don’t do what we say we are going to do is because it’s out of our comfort zone to do it, so we find an excuse, which just furthers that lack of trust in ourself. It’s ok to be uncomfortable, that’s what moves you forward. When you put in the work ahead of time, when you trust yourself and your consistent, you stay ready for the next step, whatever that is.
Trust yourself enough to know that you have your own back even if it is uncomfortable, even if it doesn’t turn out exactly like you wanted it to. Even if you fail. Trust yourself enough to know you will keep trying. You only truly fail if you quit. And you are worthy of not quitting. You are worthy of your own trust. But how do you trust yourself? You have to earn it!
How many of you have a friend that you can trust no matter what? Why do you know you can trust them? Because they have followed through! They have been consistent in keeping their word to you. Do the same for yourself. Where do you need to bolster up trust in yourself? Don’t overwhelm yourself with tons of lofty goals, just pick one and follow through with it. I’m going to be doing it right along with you. It’s something we all can improve, we aren’t alone!
My challenge to you today is to look at the goals you have and pick one, one that you will commit to yourself 100% that you’re gonna do it. And for goodness sake, Start with an easy one. Start with one that is a little bit out of your comfort zone but not too far. If you have been wanting to cut back on sugar, commit to one packet of sugar in your coffee instead of two and stick with it. If you’ve been going to the gym twice a week and want to go three, commit and schedule for that extra day. Once you realize you can trust yourself, you can start working on the harder goals but start easy. You never know what doors will open when you show yourself what’s possible by trusting yourself to do what you say you’re going to do.
You are just as worthy of your own trust as someone else is. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days.
