Hi guys!, Welcome to Episode 619 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle. If you’re new to the podcast, I’m so glad you found us. Thank you for being here. And if you’ve been around a while thank you for always showing up for me, for yourself, for everyone you interact with daily. We focus on being the best we can be and that starts with making sure our head is in the right place, so thats what I generally try to do in 15 minutes or less, twice a week, to remind us that we are in control of our happiness and that happiness starts in our head. So keep hanging, the goal is to keep getting better and better.
This last week, I spent a few days with my parents and my big sister this last week. I’m so happy I make time to do that. It’s important to me, and it’s important to them. My parents have been sick with the flu lately, and my big sister has been caring for them so well—she’s honestly been amazing.
While we were there, though, some things happened that were a little scary. Little moments of forgetfulness that weren’t there before. A few of them, small on their own, but together they stopped me in my tracks. It felt like a quiet preview of what might be coming down the road someday.
And almost instantly, I heard that voice in my head say, “I am not good at this. I can’t handle this.”
You guys know me—I caught it immediately. And you also know those kinds of statements aren’t just untrue; they do real damage. They shrink us before anything has even happened.
So I paused. I asked myself: What do I actually know to be true about me?
And I listed them, right there in the moment:
I can handle anything that comes my way.
I am resilient.
I am mentally and physically strong.
So start acting like it, Heidi.
And that’s what I did. I leaned in. I helped. I listened. I laughed with them. I held the hard feelings without letting them take over. And when I left, I felt steady instead of shattered.
Here’s what I keep coming back to: our self-talk. Every single one of us has to work on this every single day. Some of us don’t even realize how harsh we are to ourselves, or how often we talk ourselves out of our own strength before we’ve even needed it.
We say things in our heads we would never say out loud to someone we love. Never.
Imagine your best friend called you and said, “Something hard is coming with my family, and I just don’t think I’m cut out for it.” Would you agree? Would you say, “Yeah, you’re probably right—you’ve never been great at tough stuff”? Of course not. You’d remind her of every time she’s risen to the occasion. You’d tell her she’s stronger than she feels right now. You’d say, “You’ve got this. You always do.”
So why is it so hard to offer ourselves that same grace? It’s ok to admit things are hard or will be hard, it’s also ok to not want to handle them, not want to deal with hard things but still know I’m going to handle them anyway. Because I’m a person who shows up for my people even when it’s hard, especially when it’s hard.
The truth is, hard things are coming for all of us. That’s not being pessimistic; it’s just life. Family stuff, health stuff, loss, change—it shows up. And when it does, the voice we’ve been practicing in the quiet moments is the one that will speak the loudest.
So we have to practice the right voice now.
For me, in that moment with my parents, I could have let the story be: “This is too much. I’m not built for this.” And part of me wanted to—because saying “I can’t” first feels safer somehow. Like it lets me off the hook somehow. Like I don’t have to be responsible. I don’t have to manage it,
But that’s not safety. That’s just fear dressed up as denial. I know good and well I will always be there if my parents need me or anyone in my family for that matter.
Instead of belittling myself, I acknowledged what was actually true: This is hard. It might get harder. And I’m still a person strong enough to walk through it. I’ve walked through hard things before. I’ll walk through them again. I don’t have to enjoy it, but I can handle it.
That small shift changed everything. It let me show up fully—for my parents, for my sister, and for myself.
My challenge to you this week: Start listening to what you’re saying to yourself. Just notice. No judgment at first—just curiosity.
When you catch a thought that’s harsh or limiting, pause and ask: Would I say this to someone I care about? If the answer is no, then it doesn’t get to live rent-free in your head.
Then give yourself something better. Not fake cheerfulness, not pretending it’s easy—just truth. Something simple and solid you know about yourself.
“I’m still here.”
“I’ve made it through everything so far.”
“I’m capable of more than I feel right now.”
“I’m allowed to learn as I go.”
Whatever feels honest.
Because the voice in your head isn’t neutral. It’s building you up or tearing you down, every day, in a thousand tiny ways. And you get to choose which one it does.
You are stronger than the hardest moments make you feel. You are more resilient than the scariest previews suggest. And you deserve to hear that—from yourself—especially when no one else is around to say it. Build yourself up. Be your own biggest cheerleader. It matters.
Share this with 3 people who need to remember to be nice to themselves. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days.
