Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 640 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast! I’m so glad you’re here. I love this new video thing, and I love you guys for bearing with me while I get it right, I know the glare of the light ring is there, I also know eventually I will figure out how to avoid it, but for now, consistency over perfection is the key to a lot of our success. Now I just kind of made that up but if feels true, anyway If you’re new to the podcast, welcome, thanks for spending a few minutes of your day with me — it really does take just a few minutes a day twice a week to start being the best version of you because it starts in your head. And I love to talk about it because no one ever told me growing up how important it is to be aware of the thoughts you think. There are so many thoughts we think every day, research shows thousands and thousands of them, most of which we aren’t even aware of, and those are the ones silently and subtly derailing the things we want most, whether it’s a great relationship, more money, success, to lose weight… If there is something you desperately want but can’t seem to get yourself to do the things it takes to have it, you have a story or a thought that’s stopping you. But don’t despair — you found this podcast because your inner guidance system is leading you towards the easiest path for you to reach that thing you want. So keep hanging out because we are all about getting out of our own way on the journey to being the best version of who we’re meant to be and it starts in your head…
Ok, so I recently did an episode where I talked about how I have been ultra aware of noticing the thoughts that keep me stuck or keep me from reaching certain goals I want for myself. I did this by not allowing myself to get distracted in all the regular ways I would distract myself. I became hyper aware of the triggers that caused me to distract myself. More than once I have caught myself having thoughts about finally doing video for my podcast — thoughts that would normally have me reaching for my phone to scroll X or running to do laundry like it’s my favorite thing to do (obviously it’s not), but I used to think it would feel better than sitting with the negative thoughts I would have about my success or lack of.
Because we are sneaky — we use good actions to distract ourselves from hard goals all the time. Once you start noticing, it’s hard to stop noticing and then you start noticing all the ways you hold yourself back. Because I gotta tell ya, no one holds you back more than you hold yourself back. I started noticing I would eat food that wasn’t good for me that I didn’t even really want just to fit in with the people around me. I would drink alcohol that I didn’t really want just to fit in with the people around me. Because we want to be loved, we want to be accepted and we want to feel like we are part of the group. And most of that is very subconscious.
So I realize that I do that a lot. And I knew that I was going to be traveling with my family and I also knew Eric and I eat a much cleaner diet than most people we are around but I will sometimes eat or drink things to fit in. Eric doesn’t have this issue at all, but I do. So I made a commitment to myself that I wasn’t going to eat or drink anything out of peer pressure — if I wanted it, okay that’s fine, but if I was only doing it to fit in or to make someone else not feel bad, I would not allow that to happen. That was my commitment to myself ahead of time. And guess what? I noticed more than once I started to say yes when I really wanted to say no, but I caught myself and ultimately said no instead. Being totally transparent, I did feel guilty saying no to snacks my mom offered or one evening I didn’t feel like an evening cocktail, so I declined. I felt guilty but there was part of me that was really proud of myself for keeping my commitment to myself.
Beyond that though, I also noticed other things I would do without even realizing it. Like how quick I’d start to agree to help with something my gut was whispering I actually needed that time for my own projects. Or the little thought that pops up right before I sit down to record video: “Who am I to put this out there? What if they think it’s silly?” Those sneaky ones that make the important stuff suddenly feel heavier.
It got me thinking about how much of our everyday behavior is quietly driven by this deep, ancient need to belong. We learn early on that being easy, agreeable, going with the flow keeps the peace and keeps the love coming. But at what cost? Every single time we say yes or reach for that extra snack or scroll instead of creating, just to avoid a tiny bit of awkwardness or guilt, we’re whispering to ourselves that our own desires, our health, our big dreams aren’t quite as important as everyone else feeling comfortable. And those whispers add up. They create the quiet blocks that keep us from the life we’re actually meant for.
The beautiful part — and I swear this is what keeps me so excited to share these things with you — is that once you start catching these moments, even imperfectly, you start reclaiming your power in the sweetest way. During that trip, each time I chose me, even with that little twinge of guilt in my chest, I felt a little more solid inside. More anchored. More like the version of Heidi who’s finally showing up fully for her own life instead of performing for the group. And isn’t that what we all secretly crave? To stop abandoning ourselves in those tiny ways that somehow snowball into feeling stuck, tired, or unfulfilled?
I share this because I know I’m not the only one nodding along right now. Maybe you’re thinking about your own family gatherings where you automatically reach for the wine or the cookies just to keep the vibe light. Or maybe it’s that moment you say “sure, I’ll watch the kids this weekend” even though you have plans that didn’t include that but you don’t want to be seen as selfish Or the way you keep putting off signing up for that yoga class or starting the side hustle because the quiet thought “what if they laugh or I fail and everyone sees?” feels safer than risking judgment. Or even agreeing to stay late at work again so your boss thinks you’re the reliable team player, while your own big dreams sit quietly on the back burner. Those thoughts feel so normal, so automatic — like background music we’ve stopped hearing. Or the clutter you stopped seeing. But when you gently start to hear them again… that’s where everything begins to shift.
Your inner guidance brought you here for a reason. To remember that you can choose thoughts that actually support the wildly successful lifestyle you’re creating — one aware, kind, curious moment at a time. Think about the relationships that could feel deeper and lighter if you showed up more like your real self instead of the version trying to fit perfectly. Imagine the extra energy you’d have for your big goals if you weren’t spending it on “good” distractions or people-pleasing. It’s so liberating. And the crazy thing is, it doesn’t require a huge overhaul. It starts exactly where you are, with whatever is showing up in your life right this week.
So my challenge for you this week is simple and so powerful: Just pay gentle attention to those moments when a thought about belonging, approval, fitting in, or avoiding a little discomfort pops up — especially around food or drink, saying yes to things, or stepping toward one of your goals. Don’t try to fix or change anything yet. Just notice it with kindness and curiosity, like you’re lovingly watching a good friend who’s doing their best. See what happens. I have a feeling you’re going to be surprised at how much lighter and clearer you feel by the end of the week.
If this resonated even a little, would you share it with one friend who might need that reminder too? Remember, it really does start in your head and you’re already on the most beautiful path. I love you guys and I’m rooting for you. I’ll talk to you in a few days!
