Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 576 Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast. I’m Heidi and I’m so glad you’re here with me today. If you’re new, this is the place where we dive into real-life stories, mindset shifts, and practical ways to live a more intentional, fulfilling life. We talk about growth, presence, and how the universe is always nudging us toward our best selves—even when it feels a little uncomfortable. Today, I wanted to talk about a simple but powerful idea: saying less. It’s something I’ve been reflecting on a lot lately, and I think it’ll resonate with you if you’ve ever found yourself giving advice when no one asked for it or getting caught up in your own head during a conversation. Let’s jump in.
So, picture this: I was chatting with my little sister, Molly, the other day. She’s telling me about some stuff going on in her life nothing major just—normal 30 year old stress. And me, being the big sister who’s basically like a second mom to her, I jump in with unsolicited advice.
You know, “Well, have you tried this?” or “Maybe you should do that.” But she wasn’t looking for solutions; she just needed to vent, to get it off her chest. And that’s totally valid—sometimes we all just need someone to listen without fixing everything.
Looking back, the funny thing is, my intuition was screaming at me the whole time. It was like this quiet voice in my head saying, “Heidi, don’t say it. That’s not what she needs right now.” But nope, my ego took the wheel, and I blurted it out anyway. Of course, her response was exactly what you’d expect—a bit defensive, a little frustrated. We moved past it, but it got me thinking: Why didn’t I listen to that inner nudge? Why do we ignore our intuition when it’s trying to guide us?
The very next morning, during my meditation—which, if you know me, is my non-negotiable daily ritual—the universe stepped in, as it always does when I’m open to it. It guides us to the path of least resistance, the one that leads to the best outcomes, and it does the same for you too. That session was all about presence: how to be truly present while still fully experiencing life as it unfolds. I’ve always had this image in my mind that being present means you have to be like a monk, secluded on a mountaintop, away from all the noise and distractions of everyday life. But what I relearned—and I say relearned because deep down, I think I already knew this but had forgotten—is that you can be present right in the middle of your busy, messy life. You don’t have to retreat from the world; you can engage with it fully, just with more awareness.
Applying that to my conversation with Molly, if I’d been more present, I still would have listened intently—I love hearing about her life—but I would have said less. I wouldn’t have let my need to “help” override what she actually needed in that moment: just a supportive ear.
Since that meditation, I’ve been noticing this pattern in other conversations I’ve had. Like, I’ll replay talks with friends or family, and I realize I had this running commentary in my head while they were speaking. Thoughts like judgments or opinions bubbling up, but I ignored them and just kept talking. Now, with this fresh perspective on presence, I see how saying less could have changed those interactions. What I said often came from a place of judgment, not pure love or empathy. And if you’ve listened to my episode 575 on the anti-to-do list—go back and check it out if you haven’t—one of the big things on my list is to stop judging people. I literally wrote it down: “Do not judge.” It hurts to admit, but it took someone I love dearly, my baby sister Molly, to hold up a mirror and show me I was still doing it. I wasn’t addressing it on my own, so the universe gave me a gentle shove—or maybe not so gentle—in the right direction.
That’s the thing: the universe is always working in your favor, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Those painful moments? They’re often the quickest teachers. Don’t write them off as just negative experiences; ask yourself, “What is this trying to help me with? What growth is hiding here?” Molly and I ended up having another tough conversation after that initial one, but that’s okay—we’re both growing, and we’re helping each other do it. Growth rarely comes without some growing pains, right? But something really insightful, maybe even life-changing, came out of it.
We were talking about our mom, who’s been dealing with these debilitating migraines for a while now. They’re awful—they knock her out for days. In the same chat, Molly and I mentioned how we’ve both been mostly gluten-free, grain-free, and dairy-free for the last couple of years. It’s made us feel so much better—more energy, clearer minds, fewer aches. Then Molly said something about feeling bad for Mom because she knows how brutal migraines are, but luckily, she hasn’t had one in a couple of years. Boom—we both had this aha moment. Could it be that cutting out gluten and grains stopped Molly’s migraines? And if it worked for her, could it help Mom too? We wouldn’t have connected those dots if we hadn’t been willing to push through that hard conversation. See? Things are always aligning for your good, even in the discomfort.
This ties back to choosing presence anytime, anywhere. It’s not about shutting off your thoughts completely—that’s impossible for most of us. It’s about noticing them without getting sucked in. You don’t go down the rabbit hole; you acknowledge the thought, let it pass, and stay anchored in the moment. For me, that means in conversations, I pause before speaking. I ask myself, “Is this coming from love? Does this need to be said right now?” Often, the answer is no—and that’s when saying less becomes a superpower.
Let me make this relatable for you. Think about a time when you were in a heated discussion with a partner or friend. Your mind is racing with all these comebacks or criticisms, but if you had just breathed, stayed present, and said less, how might that have shifted things? Maybe it would have opened space for real connection instead of defensiveness. Or at work, during a meeting, instead of jumping in with your opinion every time, what if you listened more? You might learn something valuable or avoid unnecessary conflict.
Practicing this doesn’t require a total life overhaul. Start small. Next time you’re talking to someone, notice your urges to interrupt or advise. Tune into your intuition—is it saying “hold back”? Honor that. Over time, it builds. You’ll judge less, connect more, and feel that sense of flow where life feels like it’s working with you, not against you.
And look this doesn’t just work with conversations with other people. Being present while experiencing life also works when you’re alone with your own thoughts. Being present doesn’t mean you don’t have unpleasant thoughts, it means when you have them, you notice them and you either feel what you need to feel and move on or you notice the thought, realize it’s not a thought you want to keep thinking or going down that rabbit hole so you find a better feeling thought instead. There’s a lot of power in our thoughts, being aware of them is huge.
I’ve been experimenting with this since my chat with Molly, and it’s already making a difference. Conversations feel lighter, more authentic. I’m showing up from love, not ego. I’m also realizing that being present for my thoughts doesn’t mean I don’t have negative thoughts, it just means I don’t have to dwell on them. Good stuff.
And don’t forget, if you’re working on your own anti-to-do list—like stopping judgment or over-talking—the universe will support you. It might send mirrors in the form of people or situations, but that’s growth in action.
My challenge to you today is to practice not only listening but heeding that little voice in your head when it tells you to “say less”I hope this episode gave you some food for thought—maybe even a little nudge to try it in your next conversation. If it resonated, share it with a friend who could use the reminder. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days.
