Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 586 of The Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast! Im happy you’re here. And I’m grateful for each and every one of you. Together we are lifting the energy of the world by working on being our best selves, so thank you for being part of that. Remember to subscribe and share the episodes if you’re loving them, 10 minutes of positive mindset work is sometimes all it takes to get us on a trajectory of feeling better and putting good energy into the world. Because we need that right? Things aren’t always rainbows and butterflies so if we start the day with on a positive note it helps us to deal with the little upsets we face.
One day a few weeks ago something not so great happened in my world, it must not have been that bad because I don’t remember even what it was. But I remember the conversation about it because the advice I got stayed with me. I was talking to Eric my husband who is full of wisdom I was talking to him about this thing that happened and I said, you know everything is vibration so I attracted this somehow but I don’t feel like I should have, how do I fix that? And he said “Heidi, there will be things out of your control that happen, it’s how you react, it’s how you move forward that matters. And ever since then I have been sensitive to how I react to things that in my opinion are negative or not ideal. I notice how much worse they are if I ruminate on them, I also notice how much worse I feel if I ruminate on them. We have an option if we allow it, to thrive regardless of what is happening around us. It all depends on our attitude.
If every little problem we encounter is accentuated and dramatized then of course they will stay with us longer and we will create more problems because of it.
Our thriving isn’t externally based. It’s an internal creation that is often mistaken for external.
My precious niece recently started college. She has been loved and has had a super close knit family and friend group all through her school/ high school years but she went to college where she doesn’t have that yet, her friends are in different colleges and her mom and dad of course can’t be there for every moment. She found the first week to be really difficult. As expected the next week was easier, she is finding her way in this new environment. My brother said he is so proud of how she is doing because she is learning to manage on her own. She had a big dose of anxiety one certain day and to manage it she got outside and went for a long walk on her own. She said she felt so much better knowing that was something that works for her. Thats something she can come back to again and again and she will be better for it. She’s growing and with growth comes discomfort, but she’s also thriving anyway. She’s thriving because her way of handling some of the obstacles she’s dealing with moves her forward instead of setting her back.
When things get hard it’s easy to fall into bad habits but that makes it very difficult to thrive.
You know, it’s funny how often we think thriving means everything has to be perfect. We imagine that to feel good, to feel successful, our lives need to look like those curated social media feeds—flawless, sunny, and effortless. But that’s not real. Thriving isn’t about having a life without problems; it’s about how we show up for ourselves when the problems come. It’s about choosing to move forward, even when the path feels rocky.
Like my niece, She’s navigating this huge transition in college, and it’s not just about finding her way to class or making new friends. It’s about discovering who she is when the familiar safety nets aren’t there. That walk she took when anxiety hit? That was her choosing to thrive. She didn’t wait for someone to fix it for her. She didn’t spiral into “why is this happening to me?” She took a step—literally—and found a tool that worked for her. That’s the kind of resilience we can all tap into.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this idea of resilience lately, especially after that conversation with Eric. It’s not just about bouncing back; it’s about building forward. When something negative happens—like a work project falling apart, a disagreement with a friend, or even just a bad day—it’s tempting to let it define the moment. To let it color everything. But what if we saw those moments as invitations to grow? What if, instead of asking, “Why is this happening?” we asked, “What can this teach me?” That shift in perspective is everything. And a big thing we can do to help ourselves have that shift is the questions we ask ourselves. Our brain is going to answer any question you give it, it’s kind of like Chat gpt or Grok. If you ask a question it is going to very specifically answer that exact question, so your brain does the same thing. So when you ask yourself why is this happening, your brain starts listing off all the reasons why it’s happening…well you skipped class so you missed the notes which caused you to fail the test, which meant you had to retake the class and now you’re beating yourself up but if you ask “what can this teach me?” Your brain searches for what you’re learning so “Ok I learned I have to make it to every class so that this doesn’t happen again” duly noted. See positive movement forward for next time. So be cautious of the questions you ask yourself, Frame every question so that it moves you forward rather than dwelling on the past. If you are at a loss for a positive question, you can always use my favorite question that I ask myself all the time. “How is this working in my favor?” Thriving is not about waiting for the perfect circumstance. It’s about deciding to show up for yourself even when things feel messy. And it’s not about being positive all the time. That’s not realistic. It’s about being Intentional. It’s about noticing when you’re slipping into those bad habits like ruminating like my niece could have done or maybe even venting endlessly which keeps you stuck in the loop of the problem. So it’s not about false positivity, it’s about choosing a different path if the one you are on isn’t serving you. It’s about intentionally choosing a path that moves you forward instead of keeping you stuck. Do you ever remember riding your bike when you were young or maybe even as an adult and you are riding in a rut that is leading you wherever that rut is heading. If you see a different path that you think would be better for you, you know you have to get out of that rut in order to take that different path but you also know it’s a little bumpy and tricky to get out of the rut but once you’re out of it, off you go. Life is like that too. Sometimes you’re at a crossroad. One path is the same ole rut and the other is leading somewhere brighter. See yourself choosing the brighter path.. We get into these well worn ruts that are only headed in one direction, in order to get out of them, we have to do something different, which is uncomfortable but exhilarating on the other side. Thriving takes growth. Growth takes discomfort.
Maybe you’re thinking right now about a rut you’ve been in lately. Maybe it’s a habit of worrying or maybe even complaining. What’s something you can do to hop onto a new path? Where even though life is handing you challenges, you thrive anyway.
My challenge to you today is to choose intentionally no matter what life throws your way to look for ways you can put yourself on at least a path to feeling better, a path to move you forward, a path where you’re thriving anyway. Share this with 3 people who you would love to see thrive. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days.
