Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 405 of the wildly successful lifestyle podcast! I hope you’re having a wonderful day or night or whenever you’re listening…I hope you’re having a good one and if you’re. It I hope this helps you feel better. We all want to feel good don’t we? I know I do.
The other day started out so beautifully, I was feeling so good. I got up early did my morning routine of journaling, meditation and listening to something positive to get my head in the right direction for the day and then my husband Eric woke up. Uh oh does that sound like I’m about to throw him under the bus?? lol. To be fair I talk about him a lot and I do think he comes off to you guys as perfect but he’s not. Not 100% of the time anyway. He is most of the time but he woke up on the wrong side of the bed that day and so I thought ok well maybe we should shake it off on a walk together because it’s sunny and lovely out so I asked him if he wanted to go for a walk with me and so he sort of grumbling came with me. Well we made it to the end of our cove before I had sort of had it with his grumpiness and he had had it with me so he decides he’s turning around, he’s not going on a walk with me.
So I had a decision. I was irritated, was I going to bail on my walk too? I knew in my heart I would feel better and it would be best for us both if we just got a little breather so I went on my walk anyway. One good decision so far. While I’m on my walk he leaves for work early to which I was very happy. I’m just being honest here. He didn’t want to be around me and I didn’t want to be around him. So it’s a Monday morning and my walk is done, I feel a little better but I’m not in the mood to go to the gym and work out with Kevin because that’s a strenuous workout but you know what? A strenuous workout is exactly what I need even though I don’t want to do it I know I will feel better and Kevin always makes me see things in a different light anyway so I decide to go ahead and go. Second good decision. Kevin and I had a great workout and a great mental coaching session too. My entire mindset had changed by the time I was done. But now, I had a client meeting at 12 and I had to decide if I was going to keep my routine of sauna and cold shower and go from the gym to my meeting or skip the sauna/cold shower. I was on a roll and I know I feel like a million bucks after hanging with Lena in the sauna and then I follow that up with a cold shower which wakes me up and gets me going so I stuck to that routine too. Third good decision, so By the time I got to my design appointment, I felt AMAZING again and I was on point.
It’s so easy when you’re mad to just throw all your good habits out the window but where’s the logic in that you’re taking a bad day and you’re making it worse. You’re piling on yourself!
I didn’t feel like doing any of my good habits because I was so irritated at Eric for ruining my day. But honesty would it have been Eric’s fault if I opted out of my walk? Would it have been Eric’s fault if I skipped the gym and opted to just sulk in the tub and go straight to my design appointment? Now some of you might be thinking “kind of”. And I love you for that because it feels so good to blame someone else or to hear a well meaning friend say you were justified or it was his fault, that feels good and god love em…but that’s taking the power of your situation directly out of your hands and plopping it in the hands of someone else who oh by the way is grumpy. BUT think about it, he had already left for work. How could I blame him if I chose to change my routine because now now I’m grumpy and getting grumpier as the day goes of my choices. Because I chose not to do the things I knew would make me feel tons better. Do you know how good it felt to follow through on my routine even though I didn’t feel like it? It felt so empowering. I felt like I had my own back. You know?
It is so empowering to not allow a bad moment to become a bad day or a bad day to turn into a bad week. And someone else’s bad day doesn’t have to turn into your bad day either. Even though a lot of times it affects you, it doesn’t have to derail you, that’s your choice.
We get to decide how our day goes when we take full responsibility for our mood. Now this doesn’t apply when you’re actually sick. Then you need to really rest, when you are sick it’s hard for your body to repair when it’s busy working out. Give it time to do that because guess what…you are often making it worse when you don’t take care of yourself.
We have things so backwards I think. We are on the struggle bus and our brain will often give us bad advice.
Sometimes we tell ourselves oh it’s been a bad day so I deserve this bottle of wine. I’m just gonna wash it all away. Now. Is that gonna make you feel better? Ok maybe for a minute but how about tomorrow? I read once that drinking alcohol to feel better today is borrowing from tomorrow’s happiness. That couldn’t be more true. That’s one of the biggest things I think people do and I have been guilty of it too. You have a stressful day so you head for the alcohol which makes you feel better for the moment but tomorrow it’s not good. Now your bad day has turned into two bad days and how are your choices when you are hungover? Do you feel like the gym? Do you want super healthy food? No and no. Ask me how I know.
And look I do drink but I have cut it so far back that I may at some point not drink at all. Not there yet… but I can see it as a possibility now, before no way.
Every choice we make is ours. We own it. And those choices affect the next choices we make. It’s a snowball effect. You know it. I know it. Seriously. Life is supposed to feel good. If you’re not feeling good if you’re not finding joy, it’s not someone else’s fault. It’s yours. And the sooner you accept that, the sooner you have the power to change it.
I changed my own mood the other day. I couldn’t change Eric’s, he has to do that himself, I tried…but the more I tried to change his, the more irritated he got. Haha. That’s how it works. That’s not my job. Now my changing my mood and turning my day around had a pretty big affect on him. But only because he was willing to see it and let it. Not because I was trying for that to happen. He’s pretty in touch with his moods and choices as well so it didn’t take long for me to get a text apologizing for the grumpiness.
That made me happy but I didn’t need that to change my day because I was already changing it on my own.
Being able to influence external circumstances is powerful…sure. But When you can influence your internal world that’s when you have true peace.
My challenge to you today is if you wake up on the wrong side of the bed or maybe your spouse does…watch closely the decisions you make because of it. Are those decisions making things worse or making them better? It is completely within your power either way. But I challenge you to check yourself and decide I’m not gonna make this bad day any worse. Share this with 3 people who ever have bad days. I love you guys. I’ll talk to you in a few days!
