Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 666! I’m so glad you’re here today because I’ve been thinking about something that’s been quietly shaping my days and my marriage for years a lot of times without my even noticing it. Something that doesn’t come with big announcements or grand gestures, but it feels like the deepest kind of love there is. I call it quiet love.
I’m usually up before the sun—super early riser, you know me. I shuffle into the kitchen, make my coffee, and we do our little trio drink from Rho—resveratrol, NAD+, and that third one that always slips my mind until I’m holding the packet. While the kettle’s heating or the coffee’s brewing, I pull out Eric’s favorite cup and set it right where he likes it. I get his glass ready for his morning drink too. Nothing fancy. Just there, waiting for him so his morning flows a little easier.
I do it because I love him. I genuinely want his day to start sweet. And here’s the beautiful part—often, because he stays up a little later than I do, I’ll wake up to my own cup already set out with a sweet little note: “Good morning, beautiful.” Just those few words make my whole heart light up and makes me smile.
That’s what I’m talking about when I say quiet love.
We don’t announce it. We don’t keep score. We just do these small things because we want the other person’s day to feel a little softer, a little more supported.
I started noticing this more and more after we’d been married a while. You know how it is—life gets busy, we get caught up in our own heads, our own to-do lists, our own worries. And sometimes we miss the subtle ways our partner is showing up for us.
For instance in everyone’s house there is usually the neat one and the one that is not as neat, to put it nicely…. Well in our house, Eric is the neat one. I’m aware of that difference, so I’m constantly doing little things around the house to make his environment feel calm and happy. I do the things I didn’t naturally do before I married him, like keep a neat closet, make the bed every single day, Make sure the house is tidy and put together before he comes home. I put things back where they belong even when I’d rather leave them for later. Most of the time I don’t say a word about it, and maybe he doesn’t even consciously notice because it’s just… always that way. And that’s okay. That’s the point. Those are quiet love moments too.
But he does things for me like that too, I talked about it once before but I have my favorite little clock. It’s special to me because my parents gave it to me for my college graduation and it also reminds me of my grandfather because it’s a frank Lloyd wright style clock. Now it runs on batteries, funny thing is, I’ve never once changed the batteries. Not once. And I never even thought about it until one morning during meditation, I noticed that that clock was the only noise I can hear most mornings because I am the only one up and it’s so quiet, but that clock ticks away, and that one morning it dawned on my, that clock runs on batteries, how in the world is it still running when I’ve never changed those batteries????? And then I realized of course…..Eric just quietly does it. Every time they run low, he swaps them out and has never mentioned it to me one time, and it took me YEARS, probably 10 years to realize that. (That’s the Power of Meditation for helping you notice things you wouldn’t normally) That’s love. Steady, silent, reliable love.
And it’s not just the doing—it’s the noticing.
He notices when my gas tank is getting low and fills it up. He notices my hair when I’ve tried something new. He remembers the little things I like and brings them home without fanfare. Those moments make me feel so seen. So cared for.
I wonder… how often are we doing quiet love for our partners? And maybe even more importantly—how often are we missing it or taking it for granted when it’s being done for us?
Think about your own life for a second. When was the last time your person did something small that made your day easier or sweeter, but you were so wrapped up in your own stuff that it barely registered? Or the last time you did something thoughtful and wondered if they even noticed?
Here’s what I’ve learned: quiet love is the glue. The big romantic trips and celebrations are wonderful—I mean, we just got back from celebrating Eric’s 60th in Croatia, and it was magical. But those big moments aren’t what carries us through ordinary Tuesdays. It’s the everyday, almost invisible ways we choose each other.
It’s choosing to put their cup out. It’s changing the batteries without being asked. It’s noticing the gas tank. It’s folding the laundry the way they like it even when you’re tired, or maybe a random text saying I love you…
These things say: I see you. I’ve got you. You matter to me in the small ways that make up real life.
And here’s the part that might stretch you a little—sometimes quiet love means doing these things even when you’re not feeling particularly lovey-dovey. Even when you’re frustrated or tired or you’ve had one of those days. Because love isn’t always a feeling. Sometimes it’s a decision. A quiet decision to make their world a little better.
I remember one morning we had had a little argument, not even sure about what, but when he came home from the gym I still made him his protein shake, which is not a small feat if only you knew, the amount of things he puts in his shake, it’s not a quick venture and it’s also very messy, but I still did it anyway. I had seen one of his little notes that I saved and it shifted something in me. It reminded me that we’re in this together, even on the imperfect days.
That’s the power of it. Quiet love keeps the connection warm even when life feels cold or busy or messy.
This doesn’t have to only be for your spouse, it can extend to anyone in your life.. How do you show quiet love? Are there opportunities to do more?
These are just small little things. Some way you can make your person’s day a little easier or sweeter—without announcing it, without expecting anything back. Just do it because you can. Because you love them.
And then also… practice noticing. Really see the ways they’re already doing it for you. Say thank you out loud sometimes. Not every time—keep some of the quietness—but let them know those little things land in your heart.
Maybe you’re not in a relationship right now, this still applies. Quiet love works with friends, with family, with aging parents, with your kids or your coworkers. It’s about choosing to lighten someone else’s load in small, beautiful ways.
Because here’s what I truly believe: when we practice quiet love, we become the kind of person who feels more loving. We create a life that feels richer, even on the most ordinary days.
A wildly successful lifestyle isn’t just about big achievements or perfect mornings. It’s about these little threads of connection that weave through everything.
So as you go about your week, I hope you’ll catch yourself smiling when you notice a quiet love moment—either the one you gave or the one you received. Let it remind you that real love a lot of time whispers instead of shouts.
I appreciate you more than you know. If this episode touched you, I’d love it if you shared it with someone who might need to know about quiet love too.
I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days!
