Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 467 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast! I hope you are well. Just a reminder that if you’re loving the episodes to please give me a 5 start rating and share with as many as you can. The world can always use 10 minutes of positivity. We will share bad news like our life depends on it, we will share funny videos like our life depends on it, but 10 minutes of empowering words could quite literally save a person in ways you don’t even know. So if these episodes are helping you, share them you never know who’s life you will impact.
Ok, Have you ever read a story in the news or maybe you know someone that made a really bad judgement call and things ended up snowballing and now they’re in jail or they’re reputation is destroyed and you thought “better them than me” maybe you even said it? Or maybe you had judgey thoughts about it? I’m going to take a guess and say yes, you’ve had that happen.
Eric and I have a classic Mastercraft boat that we just love, we keep it at a lake in Arkansas about 4 hours away, I’m a little funny about water and this lake is the second cleanest lake in the nation, it’s spectacular to me anyway, there’s nothing like finding a cove and just parking the boat with an anchor and hanging out. Literally the lake is so big and so remote, they don’t allow houses to be built so it’s very natural, but it’s so quiet on most days that we can have the cove to ourselves for the day and literally we will lay in the water and just listen to the sounds of nature, water lapping, trees swaying, birds singing, a fish jumping every once in a while, it’s so good for my soul to go. When we go there is a guy that will go the marina for us, pull the boat out of storage, make sure it’s in great condition and put it in the water so that when we get there, we just hop in and off we go. Since it’s 4 hours away we don’t want to waste half a day doing all of that so this man, Benny, really nice guy who comes out with his son, he’s always so honest and great with our boat and we really trust him with it, he owns a boat repair business and has been helping us for years. It’s not cheap but it’s so worth it. When summer is over Benny will come back out to the lake, which is an hour drive for him, by the way and he will winterize the boat and put it back in storage for us. So this last year there were a few things that needed work so he asked if it was ok that he take our boat to his shop an hour from the lake and then he would bring it back once he was done. Eric said of course, yes. Well, We never heard from Benny that he had put the boat back in storage after taking it to his shop, no big deal in our minds because he’s so reliable we just weren’t worried about. So this year when we decided we wanted to take a weekend at the lake, we were texting and calling Benny but never got an answer back to the point where I thought he may have died. So Eric does a little detective work and it did not take long to find that Benny along with his wife had been arrested, Benny was going to be in prison for 6 years and his wife had been sentenced to a year in prison but that had been commuted so she was out now, and listen Eric was friends with him on fb and these were upstanding people, he went to church and she held a position in local government so this is insane what in the world?
Turns out, one really bad night ruined the life they had, it will never be the same. One bad night of him getting drunk and losing his temper at a restaurant and then making it WAY worse by threatening a police officer, dumbest thing you can do, and he did it all in one night, she tried to help her husband by hiding evidence, he had a knife and she took it and hit it, and that got her a year in jail and she had to resign of course from her government position. Neither had any prior offenses at all, none, no problems prior to that but here we are.
I tell this story because it’s been on mine and Eric’s minds over the last week or so because it’s scary, One bad night and life is forever changed. It’s scary because have you ever lost your temper? These are good people who made really bad judgement calls, his while being drunk, hers in an effort to help her husband. I think I would have definitely tried to help Eric if he got himself in trouble like that. We have been sending prayers and love to them and their family because that is exactly what we would want if we were in that situation. We are all imperfect and sometimes we make mistakes, now obviously, most people aren’t out there fighting officers while drunk…but that’s not the point, the point is, Benny and his wife made big mistakes, yes, but mistakes are part of life, it’s the part that grows us the most if we learn from them and ask what it’s teaching us. Most of us don’t make the mistakes that end us up in prison. But we do make mistakes none the less. Maybe we took a gamble and lost a bunch of life savings, maybe we did something hurtful to someone we love, however our version of mistakes looks, the question I have is “how do you want to be treated when you make a mistake?” Eric and I have both been sending prayers and love to Benny and his wife because that’s what we would want in their situation. When I make a mistake, I want to be forgiven. When I make a mistake, I want to be loved through it.
How do you want to be treated when you make a mistake? Do you extend the same grace to others that you would hope they extend to you?
And sometimes maybe it’s not even a mistake, maybe it’s just little things that we judge others for, maybe the way they raise their kids, or how they treat their husband, maybe it’s their politics, maybe it’s the way they eat or how much they drink. Maybe it’s their religious beliefs, for me, I want my family to accept me the way I am even though I don’t belong to their religion any more and I do things that they think are sinful like celebrating holidays or voting or doing anything patriotic, all of those things to them are wrong, but I want them to still love me anyway….but I also in return get to show them the same love even though I do not agree with a lot of the ideas they have. Because you know what? Life is too short to spend any time holding a grudge against someone who means a lot to you, days can easily become weeks and weeks can become months, months become years, now you’re estranged and over what? Who they voted for? That’s ridiculous.
In order to be happy in this life, we have to remember that every single one of us has their own ideas, their own agendas, their own idea of right and wrong. Sometimes we get upset over some perceived slight, but is it better to forgive or to hang onto it? In my mind it’s better for everyone if we are faster to forgive and to overlook because life is way too short to be trying to decide who’s sin is worse. I see extremely obese super Christian women condemning someone who is gay but guess what, in the Bible, obesity is a sin too…so who’s worse? That’s why we have to give grace to everyone. Our friends who live their life a little differently than we do, our family who maybe judges us a little because we did something they think we shouldn’t have, everyone is going through something. And often you have no idea what that is. We have no idea what was going on in Benny’s head that night, but I promise you he has beat himself up enough for all of us, he’s paying a huge price. And I hope in some way he feels the love and the prayers we have been sending because I know that’s what I would want.
I want to be loved anyway, and I would imagine you do too.
My challenge to you this week is to consider someone in your life that you can extend grace or forgiveness to. Maybe it’s someone you’ve been judging, maybe it’s someone who made a mistake and you’re glad it wasn’t you, maybe it’s someone that hurt you in some way or maybe it’s just someone who believes in something that you don’t agree with, it could be politics, religion, how they raise their kids, how they eat or drink, whatever it is…give them the grace that you would want. Share this with 3 people full of grace, I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days.