Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 475 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast! Thank you for being here with me each week. We only get a few minutes together twice a week, but it’s meaningful, right? So thank you, we are kindred spirits me and you because we understand that being our best doesn’t happen by accident. Now sometimes it may look like it does, maybe we stumble on a great idea, or we were in the right place at the right time but I bet if you step back and really think about it, there was something you did that led you to that moment of an accidental great idea or being in that position to be in the right place at the right time.
That’s what I believe to be really the key to happiness and fulfillment. Allowing ourselves the opportunity to be happy and fulfilled. But what does that even mean?
Well I will tell you what I think it means.
The other morning I got up just like I always do, I have a pretty solid routine that I know really really helps me be the best that I can be for that day. So I read a few pages of something inspiring, I meditate, I journal and I take time to really just be grateful for the beautiful environment I’m in. I know that if I start my day that way I’m giving myself the opportunity to feel happy right out of the gate, I am setting the algorithm for my day. It’s so interesting that that word has become common because of technology, algorithm. We all know what that is, or we have a general idea anyway. So I looked the word up and it is so fitting for this case. It specifically means “A finite set of unambiguous instructions that, given some set of initial conditions, can be performed in a prescribed sequence to achieve a certain goal and that has a recognizable set of end conditions.” In other words….it’s a set of things that if done in a specific way will provide a certain end result.”
So every morning I wake up and I know that if I do my morning routine of reading, meditating and journaling, I am definitely setting myself up for the best day I can have, when I add to that exercise and eating healthy…the algorithm of my life becomes pretty predictable. Now, if you have dogs you know that if you’re outside and a squirrel catches their eye they are off after that squirrel and now they end up chasing all the squirrels. Sometimes that’s me in the morning. I have a lot of design projects on my plate right now that I am really excited about so I have magazines, paint swatches fabric samples right by my chair where I do my morning routine and so I know that if I just let myself go on autopilot I’m going right for the juicy fun design stuff and 3 hours later, I’ve done none of my morning routine. That’s only happened a few times because now I notice it and head it off before it happens. It happened this morning and I was like nope, you’re doing your morning routine first. And here’s the thing, there’s nothing wrong with hitting the ground running BUT if you know it makes you better to take even 10 minutes to quiet your mind and be grateful, or exercise, or start the day with a healthy breakfast or maybe you fast in the morning like my husband and I have been doing. If you know that makes you better and you have this nagging feeling that you should be doing it….If you’re like me, not doing it brings with it the nagging feeling all day that you should have.
I was talking to my mom and dad on the phone the other day leaving the gym and dad said “good for you” for going and I said I always feel way better leaving the gym than going to the gym. Mom said I hear that, It always feels so good once I do my walk but I never really want to do it. I laughed and I said you know, I keep waiting for the day to come that I don’t dread my workouts. The thing that keeps me consistent is I dwell on how I feel once I’m done. And I know that exercise is more effective than any drug out there for keeping me happy. I am giving myself the opportunity to be happy by doing it.
My morning routine of meditation gives me the opportunity to notice my thoughts throughout the day. That’s the odd thing about meditation that takes a minute to recognize. We think a perfect meditation would be going the entire 10 minutes with no thoughts at all. I don’t think so, I think the having of a thought, noticing it and intentionally coming back to no thought is the goal…Doing that for 10 minutes a day gives me the opportunity to notice thoughts throughout the day and that is huge because my brain comes up with some pretty not great thoughts and being able to notice them and clear my head of them gives me the opportunity to be happy at any point of the day even when things aren’t going perfectly, because I am at the very least aware of and in control of my thoughts.
I was losing sleep over our cabinet vendor for one of my projects. They are new for us, we haven’t used them before and this is a major project so I want everything to go as planned within our control of course. But I wasn’t getting any communication back from this cabinet company and they were supposed to have measured 2 weeks ago so red flags are going up everywhere. Finally after 4 days of not hearing back when they said they would call the next day to update me, I had this nagging feeling that I needed to do more. I noticed my thoughts were spiraling a bit which generally tells me there’s some attention that needs to be given. I say a lot when you’re worried to let go and leave it to the Universe but that’s only when you don’t control it, or when you have done everything you control. Was there anything that I could control to make this better? Had I done everything? No, I hadn’t gone directly to the source in person. This wasn’t a situation to just let go…the right thing was for me to get answers. So I decide I am driving the hour drive to the company’s building where they build their cabinets not knowing what the outcome would be, I just told myself I know the outcome is going to be good, but my gut was telling me I needed to drive out there so I did. And it’s a good thing I did. Just so happens the owner was in the office that I walked into and I explain the reason I am there, no accusations, just that I am doing my due diligence for my client. He could not have been nicer, pulled our file, we spent and hour going over the timeline and the layout, scheduled the measurement for this Wednesday so we are back on track, now they still aren’t going to make the original deadline but if I hadn’t driven out there, I honestly don’t know when we would have gotten on their schedule. Don’t be passive when you need to take action. If you have a nagging feeling that you should be doing something, it’s there for a reason. Follow it though. Control what you can control and let go of what you don’t. I told my client I was going to sleep for the first time in a week after that meeting. I gave myself every opportunity for success that day and also peace of mind knowing I had done everything in my power to follow through and it paid off. That’s generally how I approach life. I try to give myself every opportunity to be happy and fulfilled. I do that by following a set of guidelines that if I do them to the best of my ability then the outcome will be the best that it can be….an algorithm.
Think of an algorithm like a recipe. If you put specific ingredients together, the end result will be the same every time.
So I know if I wake up and get distracted by x or instagram, instead of doing my beautiful peaceful morning routine, I know I’m going to have a certain low level anxiety and also a nagging feeling that I know I am not doing myself any favors by doing that. I’m definitely not giving myself the opportunity to be happy because x makes me anxious. I know this. That’s a recipe too, it just ends up in a place that doesn’t feel so great. That’s an algorithm I don’t want to set for my life and I control that.
So are you setting the algorithm for your life or is life setting the algorithm for you?
Do you have a set plan to spend time every day in things that make you better and avoiding the things that cause you problems? If we are being honest, we know what they are. The nagging thought that keeps coming up that you would be better if you would do this or not do that…that’s your inner guidance system offering you the opportunity to be happy and fulfilled…the question is are you allowing yourself that opportunity or are you hanging out on autopilot allowing life to set your algorithm.
Are you setting the algorithm for your life or allowing life to do that for you? When life does it, you’re at the whim of anyone and anything. It’s like living on a roller coaster where someone else is in control of the ride. But you have a set of controls with you at all times, you just have to be intentional about using them.
My challenge to you today is to ask yourself Am I being intentional daily about what I think and do? Am I spending more time on things that are making me better today than I was yesterday? Am I controlling what I can control and letting go of what I don’t? If you’re not setting your algorithm, someone else is and their agenda is what’s best for them, not you. Share this with 3 people who deserve a more intentional life. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days!
