Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 413 of the wildly successful lifestyle podcast! Welcome to my new listeners and welcome back to my friends that have been with me a while. Either way Im glad you’re here.
So, My whole life I’ve had this dilemma. I wonder if you feel the same….So Ive always seemed to have two parts of me…one part that wants to do something and the other part that says let’s not. You know the one that wants to eat the healthy food only and the other part that thinks that sounds terrible. The one that wants to conform to get along and the other part that wants to do life on my terms. Do you find this to be true for you too?
When I was young and trying to be a good daughter, part of me would say just go along with their ideas and beliefs that way your life will be easier. But the other part said “hold up, you don’t believe the same thing they do, so you have to follow your heart”. Or part of me would want to be part of a certain group but the other part of me was weary because I didn’t get a real good vibe from the group.
The more you think about it, the more you probably realize you’ve had the same dilemmas yourself.
The question is. Which one do you follow?
I mean, we all have these two parts of ourselves. The one we were born with that is our natural tendency, our true self and the one we created to be acceptable to the world. We have the one that would never give up on us and the one that throws in the towel at the least resistance. There’s two parts and one of them is the one we were born with that’s powerful and interested and constantly learning and one is a mask we wear that we present to the world, Which isn’t great usually because that’s the one that has been shaped out of mom and dad’s beliefs or what you learn on tv or social media. It is shaped by your experience in life whereas the one that is born with you never changes. Its would purpose is to see you reach new heights, to see you be happy, to see you have anything in this world you want.
I read a post recently from Andrew Tate. I don’t love all his stuff but I take the things I love and I discard the things I don’t. That’s a novel idea isn’t it? Anyway Andrew’s post said “There’s a version of you that never scrolls social media, NEVER watches tv, trains like an animal and works on his business every second of every day, he’s like a dog on a bone, laser focused, he’s your most competitive self, is it really too hard to decide to be him?”
Now. He is definitely eccentric but we do all have that version of ourselves that is powerful and knows exactly what we want and knows exactly what we need to do to get what we want but then we also have that part that wants to protect us and hide and hibernate and withdraw. You have both. The question is..which one makes most of the decisions in your life? It’s not hard to know the answer to that. You just have to look at your results.
So how do you know which part of you is making the decision and also which decision is the right one for you?
I was talking to my little sister Molly about it and she was saying she has found that her gut reaction, her initial thought about something is usually the correct one.
I think that’s true but another option to know which part of you is making decisions, is to ask yourself. If no one else mattered, if you were making the decision and no one else would know or care, which decision would you make then?
I read once that if you have a big decision to make you need to see through the decision in your mind and ask yourself which one would you be disappointed if that’s the one you decided on?
One of Mollys friends was talking to my husband Eric about a dilemma she had about job opportunities. One of the opportunities was more money and a built in career path, the other opportunity was her passion. She was so torn about which to choose. He told her to think each one through and is there one that you would feel a sense of disappointment if you took it?
I thought that was great advice.
There’s guidance everywhere we look. There’s never ending guidance. There’s no end to the amount of advice people want to give. And we so often seek that advice out.
But the best guidance we could ever ask for is our own internal guidance. It usually doesn’t fail us. But you have to be open to hearing it and you’ve got to be willing to listen. Part of us always wants to take the path of least resistance but My favorite, Tony Robbins says the path of least resistance and comfort is never going to make you happy. Your self esteem, your self worth is based on you doing something hard and pushing thru.
That’s why participation trophies don’t make kids better or happy or why people who are now working from home are less happy than at the height of Covid. Tony said during Covid people thought they were depressed but post Covid it has gotten worse because people have decided they want the comfort of staying home all the time but now they just feel isolated.
Your self esteem is based on what you do for yourself and your ability to grow.
And part of you is always gonna want to not do that. It’s the doing it anyway that moves the needle in the direction towards a happier life.
My challenge to you today is the next decision you have to make little or big ask yourself..what’s your initial gut answer, what would you do if no one else knew or was affected by your decision and is this decision based on what’s easy and keeps you comfortable or is it on what’s challenging but will take you to new heights?
There’s a constant battle within us to stay comfortable or do hard things and grow. That battle is in your head, until you make a decision and then it starts creating results in your life. Doing what’s comfortable becomes a habit but so does doing what’s hard. The littlest steps create momentum in either direction. A lot of us stay in comfort to survive but at some point we get tired of just surviving we want to thrive and in order to do that you have to break out of always doing what’s comfortable.
Share this with 3 people who you’d love to see grow to new heights this year! I love you guys. I’ll talk to you in a few days.
