Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 547 of the Wildly Successful lifestyle podcast! It’s good to be with you!! Have you subscribed to the show so you get a little notice whenever a new one’s out? Twice a week for 10 minutes we get a quick little reminder that being our best is possible but also requires intention so reminders are good. Also if you’re living the episodes please don’t forget to give me a 5 start review and maybe leave a review. It
Have you ever bought something—a purse, a pair of shoes, maybe even a car—thinking it would make you feel like you’ve made it? Like you finally belong? I did that for years, chasing labels to feel worthy. But here’s what I learned: no brand can give you what you’re really looking for.”
I grew up with my parents providing love and our necessities. We would get new school clothes at the beginning of the year but on a pretty tight budget. I have fond memories of going school clothes shopping and then coming home and we would do a “fashion show” for our parents of our new school clothes. We would each come out like we were on a runway and mom and dad would clap and we would do our best runway walk! Such a fun memory. I love to get dressed up. I love clothes and shoes and purses. We couldn’t afford name brands growing up but honestly I was in a small town, maybe a few could but most couldn’t. But I always dressed the best that I could. I don’t remember caring about brands that much. Maybe a little with tennis shoes. We wore keds and Nike but Nike was a total splurge.
As I became an adult and I moved to Memphis, the big city. I was around people who had name brand things and I started equating that with success. If I have these shoes or that purse when I go out maybe then I will feel like I fit in. I would walk in carrying the latest designer bag hoping it helped me fit in but deep down I felt like an imposter, it didn’t fix the insecurity, it just fed the desire for more, it was kind of like a drug. Nothing was ever enough. I needed that certain purse or that certain watch in order to feel like I was worthy, when I got it, I felt fancy and excited about it for a minute, but it never quite did the job I thought it should to be so expensive. There became a slow realization that I wasn’t buying products simply for the quality, it seemed more for the brand to keep up an image that I was somebody. That I was worthy of being in this restaurant or around these people.
Funny thing happened over time though. The more I worked on myself and the more I worked on my internal feelings of worthiness the less I needed that external validation. I used to think that Gucci bag would make me feel like somebody. But the more I worked on my inner confidence through meditation and journaling and coaching the less I NEEDED those things to feel worthy . I still love fancy things, I just now love quality things because I value myself. When I am choosing what to buy I ask myself “Do I want that because I like the way I feel when I wear it or do I want it because I want to influence what someone else will think about me?”
Labels aren’t just about clothes. They are job titles, social media followers, or maybe the perfect family image, whatever it is to prove that you’re enough. The question is the same. Are you chasing it for YOU or are you chasing it for someone else’s approval?
Other people’s opinions have less to do with you than it does their own world view, it’s more about them than you. That’s why doing little things for yourself just because you love the way it feels is so freeing.
My challenge to you this week is to Look at the people, the brands or accounts you follow. Are they inspiring you to be your best self or making you feel like you need to be someone else? Maybe do yourself a big favor and Unfollow what doesn’t serve you. Also, the next time you’re eyeing a big purchase, ask yourself “Do I want this because it aligns with who I am or because I think it will make others see me in a certain way?
