Hi guys! Welcome to the real episode 317. I misnumbered Fridays episode when I was speaking, Fridays was 316 this is 317. Im glad you guys are here, and Im glad Im here with you getting your day off to a good start or making your walk on the treadmill go by faster or maybe even putting you to sleep…Not sure how I feel about that one but whatever you’re doing, thank you for being here.
Have you ever felt like your life is so hard and everyone else is just flowing through life happily with no rough patches? In the past, when I was younger, I would look at some peoples lives and just think wow, they have a perfect family, perfect job, perfect life, things just seem to always go well for them. And as Ive grown, I realize no-one gets through life without the natural ebbs and flows, the ups and downs, the good and the not so good. If you’re human, sometimes life is good and sometimes its not so good. If you’re human, sometimes, life is really really good and sometimes its really really bad. All of us experience that ebb and flow. Sometimes we think somethings wrong with us for having rough patches. There’s nothing wrong with you. That’s part of life. But why does it seem some just always seem to land directly on their feet and just keep getting better in spite of rough patches and some just go into despair and can’t seem to recover? There are things that will help you land on your feet and there are things that will dig a deeper hole for yourself and you have to know the difference. And side note….I believe it’s never too late to turn things around.
I was doing yoga the other day and I was thinking about those ebbs and flows of life, how sometimes you are flying high, feeling like life is going so well, you feel beautiful and energetic and things are flowing and other times, not so much. It can be as small as on a daily “how we look and feel” basis or it can be as big as on a “we just had a life changing tragedy happen” basis Either way, life does ebb and flow and, if things aren’t going so great, as long as you give it the chance, it will flow back into being good again. Emphasis on giving it the chance.
I noticed during yoga my pushups were a little harder than they were when I left for vacation. We are active on vacation but Im not doing yoga pushups like I do when Im in my regular daily routine, So now I have to work back up to where I was pre vacation. That’s life. I don’t beat myself up for that because I know I’m going to get right back into my routine and continue that growth. Maybe you went out on maternity leave and your body isn’t quite back where you want it to be yet. That’s ok, keep working, you know you’ll get there because you’ve done it once, you can do it again. My yoga instructor said she was giving herself grace for the baby weight coming off a little slower than she had hoped. She’s not throwing in the towel and calling it quits, she staying the course, which means she will be right back where she needs to be on her body’s timeline. Around that time of the month every other month or so, I feel bloated and my vision of myself becomes a little skewed all because of hormones, I know that now and I recognize it when it’s happening so I just give myself grace there too. Because That’s part of life.
Wherever you are in life, you can probably recognize the ebbs and flows. In your relationships, in your body, in your career, in your daily routines every area of our life ebbs and flows. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong, it means We’re humans living a human life. Because we’re human and because we only live in our own head 100% of the time and no one else’s, we tend to think that other people always look perfect, always have perfect hair, perfect bodies, perfect relationships. I guarantee you that’s not the case, but I also guarantee you that if someone does have a wonderful relationship, it’s not just accidental, they are working at it. Their nails aren’t naturally shaped and beautiful, they are working at it, their bodies aren’t just naturally lean and healthy, they are working at it. Consistently.
Social media gives us the allure that a person is always perfect, we think man how do they look that way every single day? How are they so happy all the time? How are they on vacation 24/7? Look they aren’t. Even if you could, vacation 24/7 would get old too, because as humans we also NEED the ebb and flow for growth and fulfillment.
Here’s the thing though. We want the ebbs and flows to be moving in the right direction, right?
So more often then not, we want to be doing the things that move us forward, not the things that cause us to digress.
Im not average and I don’t believe you to be either if you listen regularly, you are working on yourself a lot, I know that. I love that about us and for us because that keeps the momentum of our life going in a way that’s going to keep us healthy mentally and physically.
And look, You’re going to have times when maybe you have a huge setback, not just the little daily hiccups, I mean big life changing setbacks, we all are eventually. That’s why my theory is to stay strong and healthy every day because you never know when you’re going to have a big setback and it’s much harder when you’re already down and out. But even if we have a setback, we don’t just throw in the towel and call it quits even though that may seem appealing at the time, you don’t want to kick yourself while your down. It’s ok to take a moment to be upset or grieve or rest but you don’t want to pile on and just throw all your good habits out the window. You are strong and resilient but that doesn’t happen by accident, that’s part of our work and that’s part of the ebb and flow. We all go through hard times, it’s what we do on the other side of the hard times that either helps get us back on our feet or digs a deeper hole. So if you’re going through a hard time right now, are you doing things to ensure you land on your feet or are you doing things that are just digging the hole deeper? How can you show yourself that it’s gonna get better? Sometimes it just takes one thing positive that you do, to show yourself you’re going to make it and not only make it, you’re going to thrive. Because you can, but no-one can do it for you no matter how much they want to. My older sister, the one that lost her husband in November unexpectedly, she has started making green smoothies, she has started really focusing on her passion for making pottery and she’s taking steps to show herself there is life after a tragedy. No matter how much I visit her or anyone else visits her, she has to take steps on her own to show herself what’s possible. Trust me I would if I could because I love her but all I can do is love her and support her, she has to lift herself up out of bed and remind herself she still can thrive and she’s doing things that are moving her forward. It will be slow but there’s momentum in the right direction for her. If you’re going through a hard time are you giving yourself any indication that you have it in you to thrive again?
And it doesn’t just matter with big life changing things, it matters day to day too. We want to be giving ourselves the chance to thrive mentally and physically because we all can. But no-one is going to walk in and do it for us and just because we fall off the wagon, it doesn’t mean we are done forever, dust off and get back on. That’s the ebb and flow of life for everyone. I didn’t feel like going into the gym the Sunday after 2 weeks on a sailboat but I did and it shifted the momentum right back in my favor. I also would have loved to continue my daily rum drink called a painkiller that we were drinking on the boat, but I know that’s not what I want for my every day life, so I got myself right back on my only having a drink twice a week. Life is going to ebb and flow, there’s no getting around it, that’s why being intentional about our daily life is so important.
We don’t want to leave our life completely to chance. Because then we are just like a boat with no motor and no oars, wherever that boat flows even if it’s over a cliff or into the rocks, we have no control and were going with it. No-one wants to live life like that but so many do. Your habits those are your oars of life. If they’re good, they will move you forward, if they’re not so good, they are probably heading towards rough waters or worse. And maybe you have good habits but Sometimes you set them down to take a break, but just make sure you don’t let the boat get too off course because it will get harder and harder to get it back in the right direction especially if there’s a life changing event.
My challenge to you today is to accept that life will have ebbs and flows there’s no getting around it, be ok with that and at the same time be intentional about your daily life. Your habits are your oars, which direction are they taking you? Are they giving you the chance to truly thrive or coast for a minute if need be because of a life changing event or are they running you into the rocks? Be honest with yourself and if you don’t like the answer, pivot. Share this episode with 3 people today….we are changing lives and reaching people all over the world because of your sharing. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days!
