I’M THAT PERSON
Hi guys! Welcome to episode 183 of the wildly successful Lifestyle podcast! I know I say this so much but thank you for listening and thank you for spreading the word about an episode you like or just sharing the podcast so this message can be heard by others that need it or are looking for it. Seriously, if you have a thought of “this person would benefit” don’t hesitate to share. You’re being a force for good and that feels good doesn’t it?
Mother Teresa was once asked why she doesn’t participate in anti war demonstrations and she said I will never do that but as soon as you have a pro peace rally I’ll be there.
You see, what she knows is fighting against something just brings more of it.
Talking about something, focusing on something just brings more of it.
We think we have to fight, fight, fight and we have to focus and talk about what we don’t want so that what we don’t want doesn’t happen but when you focus on something, it grows. Where your focus goes, energy flows. So focusing on what you don’t want, fighting against what you don’t want, constantly talking about what you don’t want doesn’t work, it moves the momentum faster in the direction of what you don’t want.
Working for and focusing on what we DO want is how we make a change.
It’s even more important today with Siri and Alexa and all the little listening devices we have. Think about this. And social media will prove this to you every day. The things you talk about and the things you search are going to pop up everywhere because Siri is hearing those key words and sending you more like it. Your brain does the same thing, it will show you evidence of it everywhere because that’s what you’re focused on, so it just brings it more and more into your reality.
The good news is. You get to control your focus. As a human being that’s one of our abilities. The ability to focus.
What you are living right now. Whatever your living… that’s because of your past thoughts. And you may not want to hear that or like to hear it but it’s true. I have more good news for you…if your past thoughts created where you are right now than your current thoughts and future thoughts create where you are going.
You cannot change the past but you can change the future. The same thoughts you’ve always had are going to get you the same life you’ve always lived.
So if you’re secretly hoping something will just come along and shake things up, it can but you have to make that happen. You have to shake things up.
And I’m with you. I’ve been there where I wish someone would make something happen, but then I realized that someone has to be me.
Do you want a healthier body? Focus on healthier bodies. Be around people with healthier bodies. Do you want a happier relationship? Focus on happy relationships. Be around people in happy relationships. You want to be happier? Focus on things that make you happy.
You have to be the change you wish to see for yourself. A nice little Ghandi quote to throw in for you there.
I can remember a time when I wished my body felt better, my hands would itch and be swollen most of the time when I ate. I also thought because I worked out I should be that size I wanted. But it wasn’t the case. Turns out the food I was eating was making me sick and inflamed. The so-called healthy diet was making me fat. So I focused on people that were talking about natural health, true organic health. It brought me where I am today. Because I focused on what I wanted.
Before I met my husband Eric, I dated a lot of guys that weren’t great, you can relate if you’ve been in the dating world. I knew though that focusing on the woah is me men are bad was going to bring me more of that so I focused on what I did want which was someone that aligned with me and felt comfortable but challenged me at the same time. Loved to travel and be healthy and vibrant. I found that because that’s what I was looking for.
You aren’t going to find health studying sick people. You aren’t gonna find love ruminating over those that hurt you. You aren’t gonna get your dream job by loathing your current job. You aren’t going to stop feeling lonely by focusing on being alone.
You have to find a way to be happy where you are and then focus on where you want to go.
The other day Eric was in Japan all week. It had rained or been cloudy for 4 days straight. It was Saturday and I had been in the house quite a bit and I realized I was starting to have thoughts like I felt sad. I feel bored. It’s Saturday and here I am in the house doing nothing. I immediately realized that I was hoping for someone else to come along and change the way I was feeling. But A. No one knows how I was feeling because they can’t read my mind and B. It’s not anyone else’s issue. It’s mine. So I jumped up, fixed myself up and went out to buy Christmas lights at Lowe’s because they were putting them out. I took Kenzie with me. For those that don’t know, that’s my 6 lb yorkie. Anyway, let me tell you. The fun we had in Lowe’s with people stopping and talking to me and her and just the love I felt from people and how I could tell they were craving connection just like I was. That completely flipped my thoughts around. I could have easily felt sorry for myself and moped around the house and Made Eric feel bad because he’s been gone and just focused on woah is me but I didn’t. You aren’t crazy and you aren’t alone if you feel lonely. We are a social species and we are not meant to be alone. If you’re lonely, do something about it. Staying in that place is only going to make it worse. Focus on what you do want. With so much working from home, I believe people can become sad without knowing why when really what they want is to feel a part of something. If you’re lonely, I promise you that you are not alone, but you have to make a change to shake that up. It can be done I promise because I’ve done it.
And remember. Our brains want us comfortable and safe first so you will have to take control and maybe even force yourself at first to step out of your comfort zone, the easy thing for me to do on that cloudy Saturday would have been to stay in my comfies, throw on a movie and numb my brain but instead I got out, Two ladies stopped me just to talk about Kenzie and we ended up having a really lovely conversation. Another lady talked to me for literally 10 minutes about her yorkie and her 25 lb cat..and then told me an inspiring story of overcoming chemo and cancer. Just sharing and connecting the way people were meant to do. We aren’t meant to be isolated behind a computer screen. We as a species are adaptive but we are social and that’s not changing..maybe in generations I don’t know but that isn’t changing any time soon so you aren’t weird if you feel lonely. You’re human. What can you do to shake things up to not feel so lonely?
This applies to every area of your life. What can you do to shake things up?
Being wildly successful is subjective. It is what you think it is. There’s no set terms on it. You set those terms. And as you grow, those terms will also grow and evolve. That’s the beauty of life. It is what you make of it. Life isn’t always gonna be easy but it is always gonna be what you make of it.
Just like working out or eating healthy, overriding your brain to think thoughts that serve you will be a little challenging at first but we can do it, it’s been proven over and over. We can do it together. I will help you through this free podcast and I am working on some other ways to help us as well. Some exciting things are on the horizon. But for now.
My challenge to you this week is when you notice yourself wishing for something or someone to change to make you feel a certain way, stop, notice it and then say out loud to yourself “I’m that person”.
Then do one thing to shake things up and see what happens. I love you guys and I’ll talk to you in a few days.
