Your mind has to get there first.
Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 159 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast! Man am I glad you’re here. Life is good isn’t it? Even though things may seem chaotic and noisy right now, Our peace really has a lot to do with where our mind is pointed…This may be an episode you want to share…
My friend and I were having lunch. Isn’t it fun when you’re hanging with someone that you have something in common that you both care very much about? Time just flies by, The conversation is so good and you could spend hours there. It’s one of my favorite things. My friend is on a similar nutrition journey as I am. The topic came up about being around other friends and family that do not share our nutritional thoughts. Having dinner with friends that drink or eat things we don’t eat. She said it’s hard for her because we both love connection (don’t we all?) Anyway sometimes friends want you to join in on what they find fun and enjoyable and when you don’t it almost seems to take joy from them. Like you’re no fun or they coerce you to lighten up, have one bite, have one drink, what’s the harm? She asked how I handled that.
My experience has been that people around you will take their cues from you. If you are lamenting that you can’t eat that or can’t drink that, they want you to have fun and so they are trying to give you permission. You’ve kind of made it a thing so now the table seems awkward because one person isn’t having as much fun because they are sort of forcing themselves into not doing something they really want to do, and they know they kind of want you to cave because it then reinforces that we are all alike. It’s a connection thing.
But if you just order your soda water and lime and fresh salad and don’t make a big deal about it and you are comfortable with where you are, most of the time no one even cares or notices. If they do care, that is their issue not yours. Sometimes people just want you to have fun and that’s their idea of fun. Nothing wrong with that but that isn’t the plan you have for your life, that isn’t your idea of fun. Neither way is right or wrong because it only matters what each of us wants. True friends may wish we would be different in ways but still love us regardless. Now we probably do the same thing to them because we are all connectors and if something makes us happy and feel good we think of course it should make them happy and feel good but that’s not necessarily true. We are each different and beautiful in our own unique way so what works for you may be very different than what works for me. Dr Osborne said according to my labs, my body wouldn’t do well on a vegan or vegetarian diet. But that works great for some people.
This is why It’s so interesting right now with all the vaccine talk. We have so many people walking around posting things on social media to get the vaccine or not to get the vaccine. My take is this. If you haven’t researched every single ingredient in that vaccine and it’s side effects oh and then on top of that researched every single one of your followers specific body’s lab work, are you really in a place to be encouraging anyone to do anything medically? You don’t know how it is going to affect each person so maybe just do what feels right to you and let others do the same.
Your life does not have to be negatively affected by someone that has a different plan for their life
And neither does mine.
But how do you get there where you’re comfortable doing your thing without being affected negatively by what others are doing or saying?
I talked in episode 158 about getting out ahead of things. I have wanted to eat the way I’m eating right now for years but I couldn’t seem to make it work for me. My taste buds always won out. My desire to eat foods that were delicious to me was stronger than the desire to eat foods that I knew would make my body better. It didn’t happen overnight. That’s the key. You have to get your mind there first and your body will follow. If you will yourself and force yourself to eat a certain way but you’re constantly wanting to eat another way or you’re with your friends and they are eating things that you’re drooling over but you hold strong this time. You probably aren’t going to hold strong much longer because by human nature that only works so long. You know why? Because you’re human. And I love us for trying so hard to do what we each know is right for us. That’s what we are doing. No one wants to be unhealthy and overweight. But you’re not going to force your way out of it.
Most of the people I know that have made changes in their life that stuck, it was because their mind was there first. They made their mind up first and when that happens, it simply doesn’t matter what other people do or think.
I have wanted to eat this healthy food for years. So what changed?
My mind had to get there and my body followed.
The last 2 years I’ve been meditating every day and then I journal. In my journal I ask myself what do I really want? One thing that comes up almost every time is to be as fit and healthy as my body was made to be. The things that have fallen in place since I’ve been journaling are so beautiful because it led me to Dr Osborne and I’m feeling better than I ever have. I’ve always wanted that but my mind just wasn’t quite there yet. I just kind of kept getting better and better…I had to keep pointing myself towards the idea and eventually you find you’ve turned completely in the direction of what you want. Kind of like turning a huge ship, it doesn’t happen quickly, it takes time but eventually you’re pointed in the direction you want to go. This can apply to anything.
Another thing that comes up a lot when I journal that I really want is to love without judgment. My husband and I traveled recently by plane and the man to our left and the man directly in front of us both needed seat belt extenders because they were so overweight. Now right out of the gate my initial human tendency was to judge their choices that got them there. I’m not proud to say that. But interestingly, the guy up front turned around and was chatting with us and he was just the most happy jovial guy and I was taught a really valuable life lesson. To Love first.
Get out ahead of it, for me the way I’ve done that in the past is when I see people no matter who they are I ask myself what could I love about them? I have no idea what he’s gone through in life that got him to there and it doesn’t matter because it’s none of my business and it shouldn’t affect me at all. Once, I saw him as a human not as someone that needed a seatbelt extender. I loved him just for being a human, a human that was spreading joy. I’m no better than he is and he’s no better than I am. We are just in different places. Yeah, my nutrition may be better but he may understand bitcoin and run a cancer research center, who knows? I don’t. That’s it though, I have been journaling to love without judgment so I recognized this as an opportunity to do just that. When you quiet your mind and really ask yourself what you truly want and you list those things out, you’ll start to notice the things that will get you there the fastest. I was reminded to pick my habit of asking what I could love about that person? Perfect strangers. What could I love about them? Because otherwise my primitive brain would go immediately to judgment. That’s not how I want to be. Still a work in progress but it is so much better because I’m putting it out there that it’s something I really want. So, it’s only going to keep getting better.
What is it you’ve been wanting to do but haven’t been able to do it? Maybe give yourself a break and stop forcing it and just put it out there. It works for me to put it out there in writing but it could be different for you. But however works, put it out there and then let the universe do its work. Consistency is key here.
My morning routine of meditation and journaling has been super powerful for me but something else might work better for you. What could that look like? How can you get your mind there first? because our minds are the most powerful tool we have in the world. It will keep us afraid and stuck or it will set us on a path of pure joy and unlimited possibility. But it all depends on what we feed it, who we surround ourselves with and the thoughts that we have.
We are all human and I love that about us. We each have unique desires for how we want our life to look. And if you desire something that isn’t happening for you, it may just mean your mind isn’t there yet. Keep putting it out there but stop forcing it. Have you ever been in a hurry like for me I was in a hurry the other day and I was quickly doing my makeup and I was having the hardest time quickly trying to find my mascara and my eyebrow pencil because I was in such a hurry but when I slowed down and stopped forcing it, I easily found them and it took me less time because I stopped forcing it. Same thing sometimes when I’m hurriedly loading the dishwasher when I’m trying to force things to fit, it doesn’t go well but when I slow down and I stop forcing things, I’m able to see areas where there is more space. That’s how life is too.
Meet yourself where you are and meet the people closest to you where they are too. Don’t expect yourself to change overnight, stop forcing things. Your mind has to get there first. But the possibilities are endless when that happens.
My challenge to you this week is every day ask yourself what are 3 things you really want? Write them down and then let the universe do its work.
I love you guys and I’ll talk to you in a few days.
