Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 554 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle podcast! I’m so happy you’re here.
Have you ever lost sleep over something that never even happened? Maybe it’s work, something worrying you about your health, or just that nagging ‘what if’ that keeps you up at 2 a.m. Worry is like a thief that steals today’s peace by borrowing tomorrow’s troubles. I heard that quote years ago, and it stuck with me: ‘Worry never undoes tomorrow’s sorrow; it just saps today of its joy.’ So why in the world do so many of us worry, like a lot? Because worry does more than make us feel bad, it controls us and it influences what we do.
I grew up in a religious community where fear was like a guardrail—it kept you in line, but it also kept you up at night. I was maybe 8 or 9, and I’d lie awake, terrified that my parents would be tortured for our beliefs. One night, I couldn’t take it anymore. I tiptoed out of bed—probably 11 p.m., which felt like the middle of the night—and found my dad still awake. Sobbing, I told him, ‘I don’t want you to be tortured in front of me.’ Now, you’d think he’d say, ‘Sweetie, that’s not gonna happen, go back to sleep.’ Nope. He looked at me and said, ‘If that happens, promise me you’ll stay strong.’
In my little kid mind, that was confirmation that my worst fear could happen. And so, I lived in that fear for years. Fast forward to my teens, when AIDS was all over the news. I kissed a boy I wasn’t supposed to, he wasn’t in our religion, and I convinced myself that God was going to punish me by giving me AIDS. I worried about that for months. Now, none of these fears came true. Not one. Looking back, I see how silly some of those worries were, but at the time, they were real. They gave me horrible anxiety, kept me up at night, and somewhat shaped how I saw the world.
What I didn’t realize then was that my fears weren’t just mine. They were fed by a system—a religion that used fear to control. I was being heavily influenced by something other than my own intuition and reasoning. And it’s not just religion. Governments, corporations, schools, the media—they all know fear is a powerful tool. It’s like they’ve cracked the code on human behavior: if you’re scared, you’ll do what they want. You’ll stay in line, buy the product, vote the way they want you to. Fear makes you predictable. But here’s the thing: those fears? They almost never come true, but here we are falling for them lock and step the whole way, not realizing it’s because we have been heavily influenced to do so.
So, what are we doing when we let worry and fear run rampant? It’s like handing over the steering wheel of your life to someone or something else. When you’re worried, you’re not in control—fear is. You make choices you wouldn’t otherwise. You avoid risks, stay small, or miss out on life’s adventures. I recognized this about myself when we went mountain biking in Moab. That trail we took was terrifying—steep drops, rocky paths, the works. Halfway through, I thought, ‘If I’d known how scary this was, I wouldn’t have come.’ But you know what? I was having the time of my life. I literally wish I had one of those videos on because even though I was terrified, I was exhilarated and seriously enjoying every moment in spite of my fear. Fear would’ve stopped me, but ignorance let me soar. That’s when I started asking myself what else am I missing out on because I’m afraid? What would I do if I wasn’t afraid? Think about it. If fear wasn’t running the show, would you take that job, have that tough conversation, or chase that dream? People who act without overthinking—without needing every detail—often end up more successful. Why? Because the more you know, the more you worry, and the less you do. Worry tricks you into thinking you’re preparing for the future, but really, you’re just missing the present.”
So, how do we stop worrying so much? How do we stop worry from making us miss out on a life that feels more alive, more authentic? For me knowing what I’m worried about happening helps diminish it in a way. So, you might say ’I’m worried I’ll fail and look stupid and be embarrassed. Ok but if you fail and maybe you are embarrassed, are you gonna die? Or will you just learn what doesn’t work, so you’re one step closer to finding out what will work?.’ So name it. Sometimes, calling it out like that, naming it, it’s like shining a light on a monster under the bed. Second, I will often ask myself, “whats the worst that can happen?” Most of the time, the worst case isn’t as bad as your mind makes it out to be. And if it is, make a plan for it, be real about it, then let it go. Third, focus on what you can control. I mean if you can’t control what someone else thinks of you? Let it go. If you can’t control the situation? You can control your thoughts about the situation. If you can control your next step? Take it. Worrying about things you cannot control is like watering a plastic plant, pointless! One of the things that has helped me a lot in life is the ability to go with the flow, the ability to adapt and if things aren’t exactly the way I want them to be but I don’t control the things, I will find myself looking for what’s good about the situation, even if it’s just what good COULD come from it. Always look for the good and you’ll find it. For me, doing those three things, naming the fear, asking what’s the worst that can happen and only focusing on what I can control has helped me a lot. Over time, I realized most of my worries never happened. And the ones that did? I handled them. We’re all stronger than we think. I mean if you think about it, what has happened in your life that you just couldn’t survive? Nothing, because here you are alive, listening to a podcast that you’re hoping will make you better, you’re winning at life just with that small move!
Here’s the truth: worry will always try to sneak in, but you don’t have to let it run the show. You deserve to be happy and present, enjoying every day—without allowing tomorrow’s possible problems affect you today.
My challenge to you today is this, The next time you feel that knot in your stomach, ask yourself, ‘What would I do if I wasn’t afraid right now?’ Then take one step toward that. You might be surprised where it leads. If you found this episode helpful, share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to like and subscribe to the podcast, I publish twice a week and the episodes are always short and to the point but I like to think pack a big punch. I love you guys, I’ll talk to you in a few days!
