Hi guys! Welcome to episode 264 of the Wildly Successful Lifestyle Podcast! It’s good
to be with you.
I had a moment today where I didn’t feel like exercising, I wanted to comfort food, which I did, and I basically just wanted to veg out and do nothing. I even scrolled on Twitter for a while, which never makes anything better, it actually made it worse. So you guys know it wasn’t going to be a good day if I stayed on that path, But I reminded myself of episode 262 where I said we aren’t always going to be motivated and how 3 year olds do only what they want. So I pulled up a favorite motivational podcast, I put my workout gear on and I went to the gym and I did the class I had scheduled to do. I didn’t want to, but I KNEW it would make me feel better and then I had a protein shake with greens and
man, I feel like a new woman. Just because you make a couple bad decisions in a day,
don’t let it derail your entire day. Just get right back on track.
Ok, I just wanted to say that. I may have had my own little bout of drama going on there. How many of you ever find yourself indulging in or attracting drama? Drama in relationships, drama at work, drama in your mind…..most of us I think. Now some of us do this WAY more than others. Eric for instance, that’s my husband in case you’re new here, he doesn’t indulge in drama ever, it seems like that to me anyway. Drama can pop up in different ways for each of us….
Maybe simply making a decision for you creates a lot of head drama
Maybe you are constantly having drama with your friends or co workers
Maybe you are constantly in the middle of a crisis or always working out someone else’s crisis
Do you get excited in a way if something big is happening in the news?
Or you constantly update your feed to find the latest juicy gossip on social media.
These are signs that drama may play a bigger role in your life than you think, and there is probably a reason for it, one could be that it works for you. Negative attention is better than no attention for some people. So they will create drama just to feel seen and heard.
I grew up in a very loving family with one big white elephant in the room (that’s me being dramatic). The religion I was raised in told us the world could end tomorrow and we would be persecuted for our beliefs so be ready, every day we lived in fear of that. So there was this underlying stress and drama that was always present for me. We were in constant fear that if we broke one of the many rules we had, we would be pulled into the back room with the older men called elders and if we didn’t repent well enough, we would be publicly called out or even ostracized from the group. It happened regularly. Drama became familiar, and what’s familiar can often become comfortable so there was almost a comfort level with drama.
My older sister is 2 years old than me. I’ve always been the traveler. I am not afraid to adventure out, meet new people, in fact I thrive on that. My older sister though, does not like to travel, is not interested at all in meeting new people and most of her days consist of sitting in her chair looking outside at her beautiful yard. We couldn’t be more opposite. We don’t have a lot in common. But there is one thing we have in common. Drama. I know when I see her name on my phone, it probably means drama, she knows if she calls me and says a certain thing, there is probably going to be drama. In a way drama works for us. It makes us feel seen and heard in a way to each other. I believe we are using it as a way to connect even though we have lots of differences, this is one area where we can always connect. Now, I know we can find a way to connect and not have the drama but for now that’s where it stands.
I have dramatically improved with other family members though. I used to be very dramatic about my relationship with my mom and dad and my other middle sister but with coaching, I realized I was absolutely creating that drama, and most of the time, they had no idea it was even happening, but it was tormenting me. Since I let that go, my relationship has been really good with my parents and I’ve come to terms that my other sister simply wants nothing to do with us because of her religion and I don’t like it but Ive accepted it because I don’t control it. I don’t have mind drama around that anymore
really at all.
Life is much calmer and smoother when I don’t treat every little issue like it’s a major crisis. It’s just too overwhelming.
When you accept responsibility for every single aspect of your life, you began to realize how powerful that is. Don’t give your focus to things that you don’t want more of…..because where focus goes, energy flows.
Mother Teresa was asked once to come March against war, she declined. She said I will March all day in a rally for peace but I won’t March against anything.
You see she knew that in this world of attraction, the more you scream no at something, the more energy you give it, the more of that same thing you’ll attract.
Drama leads us to create a lot of unnecessary stress for ourselves, most of which will only ever happen inside of our own head. In fact a lot of the drama, I used to have only ever happened inside of my own head.
So where do you stand when it comes to drama? Do you have a lot of drama in your life? Do you have a lot of drama in your own head?
I read a quote this week that said:
“Drama does not just walk into your life. Either you create it, invite it, or associate with it.” ~Unknown
The next time you are experiencing drama, stop and ask yourself “Am I creating this, inviting this or associating with this for it to be a part of my life? And if you do get into a situation where there’s drama here’s a few tips that work for me.
Sometimes, it’s as simple as not engaging any further. If a conversation goes awry, step away and take a breath. Let your anger fade and then speak. Those are words to live by.
Learn how to say NO. There’s a lot of drama for women especially around this. NO is actually a complete sentence. You don’t have to explain yourself. Just say “Im not available” and leave it at that. Or NO, thank you. And leave it there.
Stop trying to read peoples minds or guess what they mean. You may have a script in your head that you’ve had for years that is simply not factual at all. Thinking you can read someones mind or trying to guess what they are thinking will create more drama than anything. I know for me it does. Let that go. If you don’t understand what they mean, ask them to clarify. This happens A LOT around texts and email.
We don’t want to believe we are attracting the drama in our life, But if you have drama every time you turn around, there’s only one constant, and that’s YOU. This is a good thing to know because now you realize where your power lies, if you’re the common denominator, then you can control it. Sometimes drama shows us what we don’t want, so that what we DO want is lit up like a Christmas tree. Isn’t life a beautiful paradox?
When I’m focused and calm, so is the world around me. And that is what I attract.
Tiny Buddha said this week that Life will always involve mini fires that we feel desperate to put out. If we can learn not to fan them, they may actually be able to light our way.
I love you guys Ill talk to you in a few days.