Hi guys! Welcome to Episode 372 of the wildly successful lifestyle podcast! How are you? Thank you for being here. I love hanging with you, I hope you know that. Im talking about a scary topic today…its called structure…
There’s another quote I love from Rick Rubins book on creativity….He says…..structure and freedom seem like opposites when in reality they are partners. Hmmm interesting.
I grew up with a lot of rules I had to follow because of my parents religion. It seemed to me there were more things I couldn’t do then that I could do. As I’ve become an adult I realize that’s probably normal for kids that live in a structured home. I also believe it’s why all 5 of us me and my siblings turned out stable even though there are some family dynamics we have to work through because of differences in religious beliefs, we are all functioning stable well balanced adults. To have 5 kids turn out that way I think is a testament to the parents.
But having that pretty strict structure growing up though put me on a what feels like to me as a lifetime of fighting against structure. I don’t like it.
But most of the good things in my life including my childhood have come from some form of structure. I’ve learned to sneak structure into my life without feeling like I’m being tied down.
When Kevin my trainer and I had set times every week neither one of us were crazy about it. Side note. He doesn’t love structure either, but is also very disciplined. So interesting. So we have worked out a plan that works for us both, we know we are going to work out twice each week, we just aren’t sure which day or which time. So the consistency is there, which is a form of structure.. we just have the flexibility to pick what days and times work best for both of us that specific week. It’s been working out perfectly.
See you can have freedom and structure.
I need the structure of the appointment with him but I also need the freedom of the flexibility. That’s also why I love being at a big gym is because there are lots of different classes at different time of the day so again I know I’m going to do yoga at least once a week,preferably twice…but I can choose when. Now this works for me, I have friends who workout same time every day every week and that’s their schedule and that works for them.
You see having that structure of exercising is crucial to my overall well being but if it fights my seemingly existential need for freedom or not feeling tied down, I probably wouldn’t do it. But because I do I’m very active which I hope allows me to continue that freedom of movement and agility into my old age. That structure is ultimately creating freedom long term, I just had to make it work for my own personal boundaries.
There are lots of times where structure creates freedom. My dad called the other day, he was looking for Eric because when my brother in law died Eric had a list of everything to do and not to do when someone dies sort of unexpectedly, which was the case for my brother in law well unfortunately my brother in law in Arkansas best friend died kind of unexpectedly this week he was only 41 and was married, so my brother in law remembered that Eric had that list and how comforting it was to have a checklist when tragedy happens. So he was reaching out to get that list. You see when everything feels like it’s in disarray, the structure of that list gave my dad and Eric and my other brother in law the freedom to grieve and help others that were grieving while knowing they were also getting everything done that needs to be handled when someone dies. There’s a lot. You see structure comes in so many forms and is really helpful…we just have to make friends with it.
If you’re like me and you don’t love structure but you also have high standards….figuring out a form of structure that works for you will benefit you short term and long term.
Think about the successes you’ve had in your life, I know you’ve had them, there was some sort of structure involved. Humans by nature are free spirits, but also by nature thrive on structure.
Think about it this way without any sort of structure, things are erratic, disorganized, some like to call it spontaneous…but without structure.. you use all your resources up by constantly having to make decisions.
Rick says “Put the decision making into the work not into WHEN you work. “. I think that’s a brilliant statement, but what he is saying here is have a schedule for your work where there’s no question when you’re working, only what you’re working on…..so all your energy and resources can go into your work not trying to find a time to. So for me. I know I’m at my personal best first thing in the morning. So that’s 90% of the time when I come up with my ideas for each episode. I know I’m working on that every morning. So I don’t worry about it during the day because I will have a solid 4 hours from 5:30-9:30 in the morning if I need it. Having that structure allows my creativity to be put into each episode or anything else I’m working on instead of trying to make time randomly during the day. My morning routine is very structured. The rest of the day not so much.
I have friends who are night owls and their personal best time is at night. That’s when they are the most creative. So it’s very natural for them to work at night where for me the morning is my most productive time.
Think about it when is your most productive time? What time of day do you feel the most creative and alive? That could be a really good time to naturally be doing something you love, creating something for your future, without it feeling like you’re tied down.
So if you’re one of the people like me who thinks you don’t like structure but know the good stuff in life comes from structure. Maybe disect that word a bit into how it could mean something different so it doesn’t . Structure really means to organize things or have a system.
What we ultimately want in life is probably on the other side of structure in some form.
So if you’re like me and you think you don’t like structure….how do we reframe our viewpoint on structure because it is the thing that provides us the thing we want most…..freedom.
We often resist any system or structure because we see it as a threat to our freedom, when ultimately it’s the ticket to it.
My challenge to you today is to evaluate your relationship to structure. Are you fighting against it because you think it takes away your freedom? Structure for you could be as easy as saying it differently…Consistency with flexibility. For me that works. So having an overall plan for the things you will accomplish for the week, but not having it laid in concrete. Also working when you’re most productive…that could be working out, writing, starting your new business, working on your relationship….do that when you have the most energy because that’s when you get the best results. Structure doesn’t have to be scary or painful, but lets face it, we are working to be wildly successful so it does have to be part of our life, we just have to reframe it so that it works for our creative brains. Share this with 3 creative friends. I love you guys, Ill talk to you in a few days!
